Friday, November 2, 2012

Patterns of Two


I think that the most difficult pattern to change is the rigid complementarity, for the reason that not only that each one of the partners "know their place" (most of the times), but also one of them is used to be in power over the other.  For the situation to change is takes the person that is dismissive to step up and take power over the other; however, since this situation is also the most potentially damaging to the self-esteem of the dismissive individual, it will be a great challenge for him or her to change.

Yet, the most damaging to a relationship (rather than to an individual) is the competitive symmetry because at all-time both partner want to be in charge. At all-time both partners want to be the one that make the decision. They both expect the other to be submissive and want to feel power over the other, a situation that causes an ongoing conflict.

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